Day by day, circumstances and situations determine how your day goes. Each of these events can be ignored as random events or be looked at as building blocks which are creating something new. When you can find meaning in both the good and bad events of your life, you will be able to build a meaningful life.

Describe the Process of Finding Meaning

To find the meaning in your life, simply ask yourself questions. These questions will jog memories and allow you to explore your life more deeply. This process will give greater understanding, insight, and perspectives.

Is something bothering you? Ask yourself why. Stay away from blaming other people for your negative emotions. Like a 4-year-old who is infinitely curious, keep asking yourself questions until you get to the root of why you are upset. That is where you will find meaning. This shines a light on who you are.

Another way to find meaning is to spend time reflecting on how you got to where you are now. This isn’t meant to cause regret because you’re not where you want to be, but to see where you have traveled from. As you look back on things that have happened in the past, you will be able to see the meaning of various events and how they shaped the path to where you stand now.

It’s important to know what you value, because those things have more meaning to you. This takes time to figure this out. This process includes thinking about what makes you happy and identifying what is important to you. Knowing what you value is also helpful because it helps you say ‘yes’ to what you want to do and ‘no’ to what you don’t.

There are several pitfalls you can fall into around values. Often, we value what society has said is of value, instead of what we believe is valuable. We can also fall into the trap of never investigating our own values but taking on the values of your parents or friends. Although this may feel safe and normal, as an adult, you get to look at what you value and live it in your own way. Go ahead and own your values!

Another way to see meaning is to pay attention to events that you just can’t seem to get out of your mind. It could have even been something simple, but that memory is trying to tell you something about why it was meaningful. It could be an important step to where you see yourself going.

Early in my life, I saw a speaker at a conference up close. I remember looking at her stage make-up and beautiful clothes. The thought that came into my mind was, “I could do what she does. In fact, I’d like to do what she does! I would like to stand in front of an audience and present ideas. That would be fun!” That memory didn’t fade away like most do. This event was trying to tell me my ideas were worth spreading. My lack of self-reflection didn’t allow me to go there until much later. I was stuck in the notion of my current career path as an accountant.

Another time, I was asked to present to the CPA firm I was working at. The content was so boring it almost put me to sleep, but I kept the audience’s attention by my enthusiasm for sharing this useful information with them. I remember this very clearly. This was another meaningful event to show me the way to what I really wanted to do in the future.

Why is finding meaning a good Habit?

When we find meaning in life’s events, it improves our mental health which in turn benefits both our physical and spiritual well-being.

Even the meaning found in our failures will benefit us because of what we learn. It’s good to realize our failures are steppingstones to living a better, more productive, and happier life. This helps us grow and develop. Self-reflection and honesty will lead you to the next logical step to creating a wonderful life.

Finding meaning in difficult events can free you from sorrow. Did you do things perfectly? When the answer is no, and it usually is, the regret, sorrow, or negative thinking that is likely to arise, can be overcome by realizing that you’re just human. You can use the failure to do things differently in the future. You can let go of the sorrow and look forward as a wiser individual.

Most of us want a meaningful life. Finding the meaning of your life’s circumstances will fill your life with lessons, purpose, and increased resilience.

How can you form the Habit of finding meaning?

When you spend time with people who have similar values and passions, you will develop meaningful relationships. This is a good place to start.

Review the past year for successes and failures. What did those events teach you? Can you see how meaningful they were? Keep a journal to remind yourself of the steps you’ve taken along your journey.

Spend time each day on self-reflection, assessing what your emotional reactions were telling you about the meaning of events. I like to do this at the end of the day. What were my successes that day? Where did I fall short? What are these telling me about my life and the direction it wants to go?

Spend time defining what you value. Knowing what you value will direct you to meaningful experiences. It would be good to limit yourself to just three values. This way, you will remember them so that they can be useful for you. Use these as a baseline for making decisions. Review them regularly and determine if they have changed. This self-awareness is key to finding meaning in your life.

Make a Habit of Finding Meaning

If you would like me to come speak to your organization about Healthy Habits, contact me at cathy@lookfeeldobetter.com. I look forward to hearing from you!

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